


Do Not Disturb

by gunpowdereyes



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-11
Updated: 2013-11-11
Packaged: 2018-01-01 05:15:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1040773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gunpowdereyes/pseuds/gunpowdereyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on possible 5.06 spoilers; run if you are spoiler-free!</p>
<p>Kurt Hummel will accept no reunion sex interruptions.</p>
<p>[Disclaimer: If I owned this show, half of the cast would be immediately vaporized, and the rest would be a lot more naked.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do Not Disturb

_“OUT!”_

Rachel startles mid-step, hand stilling on the door, as Sam and Santana narrowly avoid piling into her back.  Santana pokes her head around Rachel, narrows her eyes, and then waltzes into the room, shit-eating grin growing with every step.

“Well, well.  We give these two HOURS and they’re still going at it like deprived bunnies.”  She looks Kurt from rumpled hair to bare feet and back again, smirking as he tries to straighten his misbuttoned shirt and scowl at her at the same time.  Blaine is hanging behind him, tripping in pants that are clearly Kurt’s and making a vague attempt to push back his wild curls.  He mumbles something that is probably an apology which he probably doesn’t mean: his face has a dazed, dreamy, well-fucked smile permanently in place.

“Santana, the last words I said to you were: ‘I will call you when you get to come back to this apartment and not one hot second before.’  Have I called you?”  He shakes his head vigorously, looking to Blaine for confirmation.  Blaine also shakes his head, touching Kurt’s back and looking as if he’s pleasantly recalling exactly what Kurt was doing instead of calling.  “No,” Kurt reiterates.  “So!  _Out_ , all of you.”

“Listen, Hummel –“

“No!  You listen!”  Santana only crosses her arms as Kurt plants his hands on his hips and his expression tips the scale towards manic, but Sam and Rachel both begin backing away meekly.  “Out, because yes obviously we were having sex and we’re going to keep on having sex.  A LOT of sex.”

“Fiancé sex,” Blaine adds happily.  “Which is even _better_.”  Kurt’s eyes widen too as he nods along.

“To summarize, A LOT OF ENGAGED PEOPLE SEX.  Of which we’ve been terribly deprived.  So you,” Kurt points at Santana, “out.  You,” to Rachel, “out, and lock the door behind yourselves.  “You,” he looks at Sam speculatively, “can be the one to call if someone needs to really come home to . . . sleep, or if you’re on fire or something, I don’t know.  The operative words here are CALL FIRST.”  He spins and points his finger at the only remaining target, taking in Blaine’s raised eyebrows and darkening eyes.  “You . . ."  He pauses, slow grin forming before he finally breathes, "race you.” 

They almost knock each other over, grappling and giggling as they run back to Kurt’s bed without another glance behind them.  There’s a heavy thump and breathless laughter as they hit the bed, and Santana, Sam, and Rachel file out wordlessly.

“Remember when Kurt couldn’t hear the word ‘condom’ without turning fifteen shades of green?” Santana says, stopping in the hall and looking half-impressed, half-stunned.

“Do you really think he’ll let us back in to sleep?” Rachel’s brows draw together.  “You know I love Kurt and Blaine but I really don’t want to pull a night shift at the diner because I’m not ALLOWED to come home . . .”

Sam is squinting into the far distance, obviously trying to put something together in his mind.  “Do you think engaged people sex really is better than regular people sex?”    

There’s another loud bang from inside the apartment that makes them all pause. 

“Yep,” Santana says certainly, and links arms with Rachel and Sam, dragging both of them along, now _definitely_ looking pleased.  “Can’t think of two idiots who deserve it more, either.”


End file.
